I took 3 Vicodins and drank a bottle of Ichiko and I feel myself slipping. I imagine this blissful feeling to be the same as the feeling I’ll get when I slip from life. This feeling is europic. It’s just what I needed :-)

I’m so fucked up on the inside I can’t stand living with myself anymore…..

I was taught to ask for help whenever I needed it and the ones who care about me would help. But I’m here laying on the ground completely worn and broken crying for help and no one around is coming to help me. So I had to help myself. I am self made no one in my life helped me when I needed it so FUCK EVERYONE who heard my cries for help and never came. I made it this far on my own so don’t even bother reaching out a hand because its to late.

I don’t like telling my friends how I feel or what goes on in my mind because they’d probably think I’m crazy.

why am I never good enough for anyone?

Sorry for spamming you all with my thoughts that are going on in my head all at the same time. If I don’t put them somewhere I’m gonna end up hurting myself again. Not hurting as in cutting more of mentally hurting myself with my own thoughts and feeling. Lol I’m such a fucking pansy…

I’m all alone. But I’d rather be all by myself than be near you.

I feel so dead right now. Dead but still my big heart beats faster than ever.

There’s so much about me no one knows. So don’t ever for a second think you have me figured out because you are wrong.

My suicidal thoughts have been subsiding lately. I contemplate it only about 3-4 times a week now. I guess cool beans for me.

My life is a fucking mess right now. Yet on some days when all means nothing to me I’m perfectly fine. In those short moment nothing bothers me.